On the tree of silence hangs the fruit of peace.
Unknown
Serenity now; no thank you. Serenity yesterday; that would have been ideal. But at this moment, I will just sit here and think about it.
Recently I prayed to remember the words of the serenity prayer; I’ve written it down so many times through the years but maybe I threw away those notes, and googling serenity seemed sardonic. Exactly one day later I encountered the prayer in a book I was reading.
Dear Lord, help me accept what I cannot change.
Give me courage to change the things I can.
And grant me wisdom to know the difference.
Acceptance and courage. Acceptance is a deep breath and confessing that God is God and I am not. But courage? Courage means this change thing might hurt. Perhaps uncertainty or pain is a cost of true love, symptoms of being pruned, healed, and restored. I struggle to trust that the sensations I feel are not apart from God’s hand on me or the Holy Spirit’s presence within me and all around me.
In a dream I saw grains of sand draining from my eyes like an hourglass. Wasted time or residue of worthless things? Is there a difference?
I stumbled, took disobedient detours and worked for the world rather than serving the kingdom. Those burdens are but an ash heap now. For so long I lived in a cage of my own doing. False and inauthentic. Guilt abounded and shame also. But grace abounds more. Every step is subject to God’s grace. If God has led me this far, surely He will make a way for my next breath.
Can I accept that the breath I breathe today is for the place where I am?
